Marriage woes

"I don't want to get married!"

There is resolve in the voice, and petulance too. There is frustration, which emanates from the fact that brother can remain unmarried and there is not even a discussion about it, but they want to get the younger one up and out of the family home. Understandably, the injustice of it all brings hot tears to her eyes.

"Alrighty.. not for the next twenty years." The mother is playing a dangerous game, and she smiles at me to denote that she knows it. I watch it fascinated, wondering how this is going to work out.

"No!!!! Not even after that!" She is very very specific about it, and being old enough to understand that twenty years is not forever, cuts the suggestion down.

We let her simmer in her indignation. Her mom turns to me.

"On the other day, we told her that she can find a nice boy from around here. But no, she wanted to marry someone from our community, and expected her dad to find her one." There is a hint of laughter in her voice. A Christian who has been happily married to a Hindu, she can understand the irony of those earnest but naive declarations much better than I do.

"Waaaa!!!! No!!!!!!" Oops. We had forgotten the fact that the little one can hear, and has a regrettably good command of English.

Waterworks start. She is in agony, you can see that from the scrunched up face and the deep, deep sobs.

"Alright honey.... don't get married... don't get out of home... stay with me and cook and clean for me..." says the mother. May be its me, but then again, there is a slight hint of regret and sarcasm in her voice. Regret that her daughter wont always be this innocent, this huggable ; sarcasm that is waiting for the future when she will be saying " but you never let me go anywhere!"

Did I say that I love them both, the spunky mom and her adorable daughter?

Truth & the Closure

I was in her kitchen, talking to her mother.

She hovered around us. "May I talk to you?" she asked me.

Her mother wanted her to go back to her homework.

I wanted her to wait for a while, and hoped that she would forget my promise. Yes, it was one of those days when you just want to go off to sleep.

However, she is still to young to understand that may be means no and yes means may be. So she waited for me to finish talking with her mother. So we went to the drawing room, and she sidled upto me.

"Is there a Tooth Fairy? And Santa?"

She is of an Indian household. These concepts are passed on to her by her classmates, not by her family. Tooth Fairy and Santa had never visited her.

"No dear... they are not real."

She is not done yet. There are more questions to come, about gifts and money under the pillow and the logistics behind it. we talk a bit about fiction, fantasy and St. Nicolas. She understands.

And in the end, with all seriousness, she wants to know if she can tell this to her friends. Knowledge is power, especially when it is about a fantasy in which you are not a part of.

"Honey... whatever you feel like..." I tell her. This is a decision for her to make.

She thinks for a while, and tells me that she wont tell her friends, not wanting them to feel bad. But of course, she will share it with the Indian kids. I pat her head, tell her that it is a good decision. After talking about books for some more time, I leave.

I hope that once she learns all about facts that are not real, she will then start discovering the hidden magic in the world.

This is about another incident. Sometime back, I had intentionally insulted someone and was a mean bitch to him, hoping that he would move away. The strategy seems to have worked. He has not yet said a word about the death of my granny, which means he has stopped reading my blog.

I was this close to be a leech in that relationship. Always feel loved, always hold such terrible power over another being - it is very tempting. But then, it would not have been fair to him. You are supposed to soar like a eagle when in love, not fall into a ditch. I was him nine years back, and I have not forgiven my ditch from those days yet. I would rather wait out and be someone's sky than take the easy way out and be a ditch.